Monday, February 10, 2014


For a while there, I was super organized with this blog. You know, planning out my posts, pre-writing them, and posting them multiple times per week. I probably did that because Minneapolis teachers got five “extreme cold” days off last month and I ran out of other ways to procrastinate my laundry, so I blogged like it was the only way into heaven. I’ve now run out of those posts, and have been trying to brainstorm some new ideas, as I try to find my blogging “niche.”

What I landed on is this random update/mind dump. You’re welcome.

1.    Thoughts on the Biggest Loser finale

The only show I watch live on a weekly basis is The Biggest Loser. It’s me and my mom’s thing. Every Tuesday, I go over to my parents’ for dinner, my dad goes to his Swedish class (#nerd) and my mom and I watch Loser together. For the last two years, I have picked the winner from the first episode. Besides meaning that I’m a baller/nerd, this means that Rachel was my pick this season. 

If you live in a hole and haven’t heard anything about Tuesday’s finale, Rachel from Minnesota (!!!!) won the 2014 season with a total weight loss of 155 lbs and winning weight of 105 lbs. Suffice it to say that this year’s finale was a lot different than last year. Rachel walked out and rather than our usual “OMG WOW! Look at how fabulous s/he looks!!,” my mom and I looked at each other in shock and a little bit of horror. She looked extremely thin, and our looks of shock were reflected on the faces of trainers Bob Harper and Jillian Michaels. In the days since the finale, I’ve read lots of commentaries on Rachel’s weight loss and the resulting internet firestorm of negativity. I’ve been trying to figure out where I stand on the whole thing. On the one hand, I don’t like that everyone is attacking Rachel and the Biggest Loser for her startling weight loss. We should build each other up, not tear each other apart. We attack fat people and we attack skinny people. 

Can’t we all just love and support each other? On the other hand, her weight loss was extreme and she does look like she is at an unhealthy weight. I wouldn’t want my daughter to look at her as a role model at her current weight. But it’s her body and her choices and her journey, so who am I to judge???

2.    The saga of my Mulberry purse sale

Okay, y’all. Get ready for an epic saga. About a year ago, I was thrifting at my favorite spot, Savers on Lake Street in Minneapolis (in what some refer to as the ghetto). I found this super cute turquoise purse. 

It was $8. I bought it. The next day, I brought it to work and my former boss, who knows her labels, was all, “OMG Carlye! WHERE did you get that Mulberry?!?!” To which I responded, “Huh? What’s Mulberry?” Well, it turns out that Mulberry is one of the high-end brands in England, kind of like Coach. Obviously I own zero brand name things because this homegirl doesn’t give a shit about labels. My boss looked it up and the bag went for $1200 retail. Unfortunately, I had no authenticity papers, but she checked it and said she knows her knockoffs from authentic pieces and assured me that this was real. I checked it against the Mulberry website’s guidelines for spotting a fake and it measured up. I was in possession of the real deal. 

For a while, I thought I would keep it, since I own no nice things and thought it might be nice to own something so fancy. Then I had a student loan bill come due and realized I really need the money. So I set it up to sell on eBay, starting at an optimistic and unrealistic $800. But without the authenticity papers and just my word and the word of others who checked it when I showed it to them, I wasn’t making the sale. I have spent the last 10 months fielding questions from eBay buyers wondering about the bag’s authenticity, and when I tell them I don’t have the papers, they are no longer interested. Totally fair, but kind of obnoxious for me. I continued to drop the price, and last month over MLK weekend, I got the coveted email saying that the bag had sold for $499. I was all “HOLLA DOLLA DOLLA BILLS!!” but the saga was not destined to be over without a few more weeks of drama. The seller bought the bag, I shipped it, provided tracking information, and received an email from her saying that the payment to PayPal wouldn’t go through. Awesome. Since I am fairly new to eBay, the funds were going to be held for 21 days unless the seller left positive feedback. 

I bitched out PayPal on the phone, since I am really poor and felt my soul dying a little everyday that I saw my available balance was $0 AND I had already gotten rid of the bag. I had nothing to bargain with. I asked the buyer to leave some feedback if she felt so inclined, which she did, and then SHE bitched out PayPal since the delay was screwing up HER bank account. No change. It has now been 21 days since the sale, so today I called up PayPal and bitched them out again, even yelling at the automated voice instructor lady (as if that would help). Eventually, I got a live person to bitch out and she unfroze my money! So the saga is (hopefully) over and I just won some free money off the greatest thrift of my life.

3.    Auntiepalooza 2014

This month, any day now, I will become an auntie again! Not a biological aunt, since my sister is 21 and living it up in Europe and also hates kids, but an auntie to my cousin’s second baby. I know of like six babies due within the next two weeks, and within my circle of friends, three of us are scheduled to become aunties within a few weeks of each other. Thus, we have dubbed February Auntiepalooza 2014! One of my BFFs Dana became a first time auntie last week and so she and I have been doing all kinds of baby crafts and shopping and freaking out for the last month. When I found out that my newest “niece” was on her way, I promised myself that my broke ass wouldn’t go too overboard with shopping this time. When Wesley was on his way three years ago, I had a lot more time (and money, since I was in college and had no bills) so I went nuts with crafting and shopping. Well the Auntiepalooza pact lasted until two weeks ago, and now the floodgates have opened. 

I knitted this with the same yarn as Wesley's baby blanket

I hit up the baby clothes clearance sale at Target and bought eight outfits, an outfit for Dana’s nephew, and took on three different craft projects for the new baby. I also bought these booties on Amazon. In my experience, these are the best baby booties, they actually stay on unlike socks and they are adjustable so you can change them as the baby grows. I had them shipped to Millie, which caused me to have a little cry, which caused my roommate to judge me for crying while buying something on Amazon. #sorrynotsorry. For Wesley, I knitted him a baby blanket but since those take forever and I’m busy lazy, I just made Baby M a hat from the same yarn I used for Wesley’s blanket. I’m also working on a wooden plaque for her room that I think will say “Let her sleep for when she wakes she will move mountains.” Is that too cheesy? It’s no secret that I wanted Wesley to be a girl and so finding out that #2 was a girl was hella exciting for Auntie Carlye, making the restraint even harder. So lately, I’ve been waiting for the phone to ring saying it’s go time and that I need to haul ass to come stay with Wesley while Mom and Dad get him a sister.